Lessons In Happiness
by Beatles-McLennon
Summary: "May your life be filled, as mine has been, with love and laughter." A 15 year old Teddy Lupin finds a letter addressed to him from his deceased father.


_Dear Teddy,_

_If you're reading this then I'm dead. And if I'm not then I'll be there with you laughing at my stupidity for writing such a letter._

_I do hope it's the latter._

_But if it's not then I hope you understand, or I hope you will someday._

_Times are hard now, dangerous and messy and this isn't the world-life I wanted to live, I had planned a different one when I found I loved your mother, we both planned one different and distant from the war that's raging on._

_Your mother will be laughing at this letter, saying how I was worry wart right till the end. She'll laugh but she'll cry at night, so I want you to be with her when she does. Her hair will change beautifully and she will say she's fine but she's not._

_I don't know why she chose to fall in love with me but she has and she doesn't deserve to shed tears over me._

_I dread to think she will._

_Teddy, I'm sorry._

_Sorry for so many things, most of all I'm sorry if you've turned out like me but if you have, I hope you don't live in a world where that matters because I'm not dying and fighting for redemption or even for Dumbledore, I'm fighting for a world where you can live a happy life._

_I hope I've achieved that and if I haven't, I'm sorry for that too._

_Teddy I've lived a long life, one that feels longer that it has been and people will tell you of my hardships, of my burdens and fears, they'll tell you in detail of my tragedy but son remember this,_

_Life isn't only filled with pain,_

_For I had a good life,_

_Scoff when someone tells you I had a hard and tragic one because that pales in comparison to the good and wonderful life it really was._

_I had friends that accepted me, and I've found through my years that's the only thing that truly matters. I wasn't alone despite what people tell you._

_I had three amazing friends, that turned into two but that's okay, I fell in love and saw a happy life within my reach for the first time in over 10 years. And if I didn't reach that happiness than that's okay, as long as you did because the thought of you happy is more important than my own thoughts of happiness, because I love you very much - never forget that._

_May your life be filled, as mine has been, with love and laughter._

_Remus. J. Lupin,_

_And if I deserve it,_

_Your father._

'What are you doing Teddy?' Harry asked as he walked into his Godson's room. He had been helping Teddy shop for new Hogwarts supplies, the young Hufflepuff had been searching through his home's attic for his old Quidditch uniform (where his Aunt had thrown it after muttering it was too dangerous) when suddenly he ran from the room and shut his bedroom door behind him with a loud bang that left Harry's ears ringing.

'Are you alright?'

Wordlessly Teddy threw his Godfather the letter, written in small neat handwriting, and sat on his bed. He had previously been hunched over on the floor of his room.

Harry's green eyes were confused for a split second before sadness overtook them, made them cloudy, his heart weighed down in his chest like it hadn't done in years.

'Oh,' Harry said. His body felt numb, his eyes scanned the dirty paper, his glasses dropped down his nose but he didn't take any notice.

'Yeah.' Teddy muttered.

'He did love you.' Harry said with pure honesty, he moved from his position leaning against the door to sit next to Teddy on his bed.

'He thought mum was gonna survive.'

'He couldn't stand the thought of her dying, more than he couldn't stand the thought of himself dying.'

'They died next to each other, didn't they?'

Harry nodded, not capable of speaking as the bodies of Tonks and Remus flashed before his eyes, their hands touching and face's so peaceful they looked as if they were simply asleep.

Harry saw Teddy scrunch up his face, bite lip lip and squeeze his eyes so tightly shut Harry knew he could see stars.

'It's okay to cry.' Harry said in a whisper, a sort of symbol that this was between them.

'I can't,' Teddy said, his voice strained so much his throat hurt. 'they're dead, gone and they're not coming back, there's no use crying over them.'

Harry wrapped his arms around Teddy, soothed his hair down and hugged him, just hugged him because Harry knew those words, he'd said them and worse to stop him from feeling, and from caring but pain needs to be felt to let the heart feel happiness.

That's how life went, Harry knew that, and so did Remus.

'I miss them.' Teddy cried tears ran down his face as his hands clawed at Harry's back in a desperate attempt to hug him tighter. 'and I don't know how I miss people I've never met but I do! Fuck! I miss them so much and it's so unfair and horrible and why can't I have met them!'

Harry pulled Teddy away, settled his hands on the younger boy's shoulders and let Teddy wipe his tears away and look at him.

'It's not fair,' Harry agreed. 'life is horrible, it doesn't get better we just get strong enough to see past that. We get strong enough to see past the bad stuff and walk towards the happy.'

Harry handed Teddy the tattered, 16 year old letter and Teddy gripped it tight, held it to his chest as if that would somehow give him comfort as a father would.

'It's horrible,' Harry started, his mind wandered back to someone he had lost and his eyes began to water. 'that I got to spend so much time with your parents and you so little. But they're still here.' Harry smiled, sucked in a breath and placed a hand on Teddy's chest, where his heart was. Beating and alive.

'The ones we love who have died never really leave us, they live in here. In our hearts and that's where they stay until we see them again.'

'Is there an afterlife?' Teddy asked his voice small and hopeful.

'Yes,' Nodded Harry. 'I've seen it.'

Teddy nodded and held the letter in his hands tighter.

'He was a good man.' Harry said. 'A brave, kind, amazing, strong and good man. He was the only Defence Against The Dark Arts teacher I had that actually knew what he was doing. And your mother was all those things, except she was clumsy, just like you.'

Teddy stared at Harry with wide shining eyes, shining at the mention he was like his mother in any way.

'What did my dad mean- in the letter- when he said he'd hoped I didn't end up like him?'

'A werewolf.'

'I wouldn't have cared.'

'He'd cry tears of happiness if he heard that.'

And Harry had no doubt he could hear it, for the dead never left us. They were with us. Always.

'Why don't we go and get you some new robes?' Harry suggested after some time.

'No,' Teddy shook his head. 'I think the old ones fit, I kind of just want to rest.'

Harry nodded; he placed a kiss of Teddy's head before getting up and heading to the door.

As he left Harry looked back and stared at Teddy and marvelled at the resemblance between him and Remus. He was smart like Remus but amazingly mischievous, having someone like Tonks and the brains behind The Marauders as their parents did that.

'Your patents would be proud of you, you know that don't you Teddy. They'd be so proud.'

Teddy smiled through the erge to cry again because he hoped that was true.

And it was, of course it was.

Teddy went to seal the letter back in the envelope again but as he did so photos he'd missed in the rush of opening the letter fell out.

One was of three young boys, only 15 like Teddy was now, they were laughing, bending forwards as they tried to stop. Two boys with black hair stood tall either side of a smaller, paler, brown haired boy with a scar going across the left side of his face. The two black haired boys, one with shoulder length hair and the other messy and sticking up at the back, much like Harry's, were trying to push each other as the brown haired boy tried to smile but couldn't quite manage it as he laughed, happy and loud.

On the back it had written: Sirius Black (Padfoot), Remus Lupin (Moony), James Potter (Prongs). Taken by Peter Pettigrew (Wormtail).

Another photo held two people, older but one older than the other. A male and a female. The girl had purple hair and a large smile, one so happy Teddy had to smile even though he felt like he'd been punched in the gut. She was so beautiful too, her face shone and her eyes shined. The man was an older version of the pale, brown haired boy in the previous photo. He had more scars across his face, redder and deeper by looks but he was happy, a different kind of happy than in the other photo. The man and woman in the photo had their arms wrapped around each other, swaying side to side slightly. Happiness shone from the photo.

"Dora Tonks and Remus Lupin" was written on the back.

* * *

Harry came back to the Tonks home after he realised he had left some Quidditch books he'd been showing Teddy earlier that day.

After a scolding from Andromeda Harry chuckled his way to Teddy's room to say goodbye again.

His heart both broke and warmed at the sight before him.

Teddy asleep on his bed, letter clutched tightly in his hands, his hair purple, scars marred his face in a familiar pattern that flooded Harry with nostalgia. His face was content, peaceful.

Harry saw another flash on Remus next to Tonks in the Great Hall before he gently closed the door and left.

And yes, Harry went home that night and cried. He cried like a child, like he hadn't done in years because 15 years on since the war and the pain still cut like he was being shot with a Cruciatus Curse. 15 years since he saw Remus lying there and his heart still held a dull pain when he looked at Teddy.

But there was happiness too.

Happiness that Teddy didn't grow up like he did,

Happiness that Teddy was happy,

Happiness that Tonks would have loved Teddy with all her heart,

And Happiness that Remus was happy from wherever he was watching his son growing up happy, watching with Sirius and Harry's mum and dad because that's all Remus wanted, it's what he deserved,

To be happy.

But he was, Harry reminded himself, he had a pretty good life.

And so have I. Harry thought.

Because the tragedies of life don't make the good parts any less good, in fact it only makes them better.


End file.
